Because people will be standing, it is customary to keep the ceremony brief. Sadly, politics trumps principles in Kerala! Whether you are going to a, Hindu Condolence Messages for the Loss of a Parent, Hindu Condolence Messages for the Loss of a Sibling, Hindu Condolence Messages for the Loss of a Friend, Hindu Condolence Messages for the Loss of a Partner or Spouse, Hindu Condolence Messages for the Loss of a Child. In either case, develop a list of questions that your friend will need to answer. Emily Post training and consultation services are available for groups, businesses and individuals. Check out some ways to incorporate this idea when offering condolences for a partner or spouse. Mourners dress, eat, and behave austerely during the ten to thirty days after the death and before the shraddha ceremony. Hindu funerals usually take place within 24 hours of death. It is customary to visit within 10 days the family of the person who passed away. Loud conversation on unrelated topics. If a Hindu, they can participate in the chanting of mantras. To this end, even a simple note will suffice. When one is in the cycle of rebirth, you would ask God to give momentum to the soul because the Hindu journey is ultimately to reach God. eCondolence.com, LLC | Copyright 2023. Ask the person who will be officiating at the service for any tips on preparing and delivering a eulogy. Some Hindu traditions advocate devotional singing and scriptural recital during this time, rather than consider it a time of mourning; instead, realising it as a celebration that the soul has now been liberated and resides eternally in the abode of God. The more eulogies that are to be delivered, the shorter yours should beno less than two minutes, but no longer than eight to ten. (2.20) acche'dyo' yam adhaahyo' yam akle'dhyo' sya eva cha / nithyah sarva-gathah sthaanoor achalo' yam sanaathanah. If there is no relationship with the family, introduce yourself and briefly explain your relationship with the deceased. In Hinduism, theres samsarathe continuous cycle of reincarnation. This short message gets to the essence of the Hindu faith in just a few short words. It is believed that free expression will keep the body healthy, instead of bound by mourning and unresolved anger. Our Religions: The Seven World Religions Introduced by Preeminent Scholars From Each Tradition. Hindu funeral rituals decree that cremation is the custom, but the deceased body remains in the home of the family until you move it to the cremation place. Now you can focus on leaving a legacy instead of a mess. Time spent at the funeral home may vary. This may include feelings of shock, sadness, and even guilt. As there is no room for error, it is better to go prepared than be caught by surprise not knowing how to respond in such situations. For example, chewing loudly with an open mouth and talking with ones mouth full of food are considered bad table manners not because the offender has a problem with it, but because the others would find it repulsive. 5. Usage of any form or other service on our website is Funerals are emotionally complex, and knowing how to act can present a Its a difficult time, emotions are raw and theres a lot to organize. And if you plan on visiting themyou'll spend more time in silence rather than offering condolences. The family primarily staying in the family home during this time. While there's no rule book, the visitation, whether held at a funeral home or the family's home, is a good opportunity to express your condolences. Such dramatic statements serve no useful purpose to anybody except perhaps the perpetrator. Visitors are also welcome during this period. Deciding to stop by at a funeral on the way to a wedding, therefore, can be suicidal. It is customary and appropriate to visit the family at home, especially during the days following the funeral. Where are we meeting for lunch today?, How was the movie last night?, Whats the score? are typical blunders that happen, which impart an uncaring celebratory tone to the visit. Hindu funeral rituals decree that cremation is the custom, but the deceased body remains in the home of the family until you move it to the cremation place. Where would she like the service to take place? Hindu mourning rituals will vary according to the sect, caste, circumstances of the family and a variety of other elements. The last thing the family wants at such a difficult time is advice. There is often an emphasis on white flowers. Those who are close to the grieving family can gently make sure that they dont miss their meals. Choosing an appropriate date to bring home newborn. That said, its the intent alongside the words that mean the most to nearly anyone. I will be attending the funeral of a Hindu colleague. There is no official time frame for writing notes of appreciation to those who have extended their condolences and kindness to you. During the initial communication with the family or familys representative, the details surrounding the funeral, burial and memorial service may be obtained. Families differ in their religious beliefs, social preferences and cultural outlook. During this time, because the family of the deceased is considered impure, they are bound by several rules of behavior. Hare Krishna. The family should be consulted about any jewellery and religious symbols that need to be left in place. 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Doing away with anything that suggests we are arriving at a party is sensible. Blaming the family for not doing enough. There are all kinds of people in the world with vastly contrasting belief systemseach convinced that theirs is the right version. Everyone has to wear white, including the family members and guests. Plan a remembering celebration with family or friends. Instagram. Others go the extra mile and debate whether the person might actually make it to heaven or settle for hell. Not visiting other family or friends, though the relatives may visit the bereaved. Discussions about unhealthy habits leading to an early demise can be reserved for later. In general, it is never inappropriate to dress in a way that reflects respect and sorrow for the somber moments of mourning a loss. Perhaps your friends child died as a teenager and didnt have a chance to go to university or get married for many reasons. Viewing the body is not mandatory, but is usually considered respectful if the casket is open and displayed near the family. During subsequent visits, suggestions can be offered, but only when sought by the family. We hope her journey is comforted by Lord Krishna (or Lord Rama). When someone has lived a happy, full life, there may be increased celebrations and dancing. "Would you like to have lunch with me next Tuesday?" Dress appropriately, lose the perfume (and sunglasses). India Today Web Desk, I. It is appropriate to visit the bereaved before the shraddha ceremony and attend the service. Kalyana saavu is roughly translated as happy death, and you would use this phrasing to honor someones life and legacy. Unlike some religions, youll also find that Hindus mourn for 13 days, which can also determine what you should and should not write. Seeing other friends and family members at the service may prompt conversations and shared stories about the deceased, lengthening the time of the visit. For instance, the death of a teenager is perceived differently from that of a 90-year-old. Sometimes, guests also attend this ceremony. In some cases, it would then be appropriate to recognize this care and give it the honor it deserves. A kind friend never leaves our hearts; they will remain with us always. This link will open in a new window. Usually, Hindu families arrange the funeral ceremony within 24 hours after death. One should not send flowers or gifts to the Hindu funeral. This link will open in a new window. A Hindu priest is an officiant, who presides over all Hindu funeral rites. The word hearty means happy and should not be confused with heart-felt. If you are a colleague or acquaintance: Send an email or handwritten note immediately. You can see he wanted his family to live well for many generations. The funeral home will have chairs for the family graveside on the day of the funeral. Hinduism, like other great religions, has specific rituals for honoring the deceased and addressing a family's grief. APPROPRIATE DAYS TO VISIT BEREAVED FAMILY: BEFORE NOVEMBER 1 OR 2 Just like any other special occasion or celebration, sometimes the best way to visit is the day before the said "peak season." This is to avoid a crowded space and a possible ruckus while visiting. It is unborn, eternal, permanent, and primeval. Not reading or reciting anything from the holy scriptures. The ashes are usually scattered in a local river or the sea or maybe taken to India to be scattered in any one of the holy rivers, such as the Ganga. to an Orthodox Hindu for their sibling, youll find that the atmosphere of condolences is much different. I'm here for you." Silence is golden: Mark Twains classic quote is noteworthy in the context of visiting a bereaved family. Funeralflowerssingapore.com always satisfies increasing requirements of customers. In an attempt to get noticed by everyone, some folks have a tendency to be loud and overdo their visit. After all, some of the wisest people can almost convey a book in a matter of a sentence. Whats regionally accepted in Southern India, for example, may not be appropriate or even standard in the North. During the ceremony, non-Hindus can sit quietly. This link will open in a new window. Facebook. It is important to avoid language bloopers like hearty condolences, a common error in this part of the world. Sri kamakshi Lunch box Brahmin Home made cooking service - around madipakkam, velacherry. Exchange stories about your loved one. 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In all branches of Hinduism, family plays a key role in helping their loved one prepare for their death and rebirth. Check with another neighbor or look in your local newspaper for an obituary or death notice. Usually, Hindu funerals take place within a single day and sometimes, two days after the deaths time. To upgrade your account, please visit the account upgrades page. This period of time is rooted in traditional beliefs, with each of the day being divided into "minor days" (4 days for each week). You can quickly highlight a friends accomplishments without getting too wordy while acknowledging their belief systemsas a general way of living. It is also important to listen keenlythat is, without looking at our watches in between, fidgeting with our fingers or letting our eyes wander. During the thirteen-day period of mourning following the death, the presence of friends and family helps create positive karma to help prepare the soul for its next incarnation. Another common mistake is to pass remarks on how the family could have taken better care of the person who passed. Share a toast. It's appropriate to visit the family at their home after their period of mourning, which typically lasts 10 days. Serve his or her favorite foods. Please Click Here on how you can do that. 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What customs and traditions should I be aware of so that I can be respectful? Oh, I forgot I think she was also wearing lip gloss!. During this time, some of the traditions will limit or restrict participation in festivals and events, as well as discourage making life-altering decisions like changing jobs or moving. Rather than ask Do you need anything it is better to be specific about what we can do for them. This link will open in a new window. Finding the proper way to express condolences can be difficult. For the family, the trauma of having to retell the story over and over can be horrific. Those who are emotionally close to the bereaved person may quietly ask How are you and give them a chance to express their feelings. When writing sympathy cards for Hindu loved ones, geography plays a vital role. Rather than quoting the Bhagavad Gita directly, you can also take its essence and interpret that into something meaningful. Although not a good idea immediately after the passing, subsequent visits with the family can be enlivened by conversation about the good memories we had together with the person. As absurd as it might seem, in todays fast-paced world, there are instances of people placing wreaths on the wrong coffin, and even consoling strangers after mistaking them for immediate family. This website uses cookies to improve your experience. By merely being there, listening and taking care of the details, you'll undoubtedly be a great help to her during this sad time. The Hindu religion believes that when a person dies, his soul goes into another body. Family is very important in Hinduism and healthcare decisions should be made together (normally with the most senior family member or eldest child). And while most of the information provided above mixes trust with credible sources, theres such variety to the Hindu culture and faith systems that what works in one scenario may not work in another. The more you practice, the more comfortable you will be delivering it at the service. Please accept my condolences for your loss. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register. It may work for a coworker or friend who has lost their spouse. All Rights Reserved. Your mother had a happy death. Everyday Health | Visiting a family who just lost a loved one? Organ donation is accepted and encouraged in the Hindu faith and should be discussed with the family when appropriate. Memorial Day for Divorced Parents. With this in mind, here are a few ideas for what to write in a sympathy note after losing a friend. During this period, the immediate family follows all Hindu mourning rites. LinkedIn. When offering sympathy messages to an Orthodox Hindu for their sibling, youll find that the atmosphere of condolences is much different. Customs vary by tradition, but are conducted by a local priest and involve prayers, scripture readings and chanting. Today, many take their ashes to a nearby place to their home. With that, parents will often go to great lengths to ensure the success of their families. then, practice it out loud, preferably in front of another person or a mirror. Hare Krishna. subject to our Terms of Use. If you do, it may cause an annoyance as the family or funeral director will have to . According to my calculations based on astrology, he could not have chosen a better time to die is another example of saying the wrong thing in the wrong place at the wrong time. You could certainly send her a personal note expressing your condolences. Friends and family visit the bereaved during the period of mourning which in Hindu traditions lasts for around 13 days. Everything will be fine is another pass phrase where both the speaker and listener know its a lie. The guests should expect to see the body, offer condolences to the bereaved family, and take a seat quietly. It is also appropriate in Hindu tradition to send sympathy gifts. Flowers play a significant role in Hindu funerals but are used much differently from those in Western funerals. After bereavement, a person goes through denial, anger, bargaining, depressionand finally acceptancethese stages take time. When attending a senior persons funeral, enquiring publicly about the age of the deceased is inappropriate, whereas nodding in approval of the stated age is downright rude. Work from your dream country on a remote visa, A peek into where heads of various countries reside across the globe, This Diwali, try our tasty banana pudding recipe, Heal Thy Self | Early warning signs you could be in an abusive relationship, On yoga day, Krishnaprabha is an inspiration. The coffin is generally open, and guests are expected to look upon the body and be seated in the room for the service, which is conducted by a priest or a senior member of the family. Blaming the family for not choosing another hospital or doctor is a common and futile exercise that occurs at bereaved homes. The family also . However, they include prayers, rice balls and flowers are arranged around the body, a lamp is kept near the bodys head, food is offered, and water is sprinkled over the body.