189. Pickupliness excerpts for you the best and biggest collection of Malaysia n pick up lines on the entire Internet. 3) Are you a parking ticket? In my lap., 27. You, me, handcuffs, and whipped cream: interested?, 6. I was wondering Do you sleep on your stomach? [He: No] Well, can I?, 24. 6. My Magikarp knows a little more than SPLASH if you know what I mean., 10. Because youre gonna choke a lot on this dick., 11. Dont make me use my Water Gun all over you!, 22. Because youre making me want to go down. Because I know some good karma-sutra positions. Want my Caterpie to use String Shot on you?, 52. Are you my appendix by any chance? I know a great way to burn off the calories in that drink. Want to see? So, don't wait and just pick your favorite Pick Up Lines and share with someone. Id love to kiss those beautiful, luscious lips. 86. Ive just received government funding for a four-hour expedition to find your G-spot. Because I swear that ass is calling me. Hello. You look so innocent, you look so sweet, as long as I have a face, you will always have a seat., 17. Excuse me; [confused face] I think you have something in your eye. Your clothes are making me uncomfortable; please take them off. 30. I can give you a shot of protein when were finished. Who says men don't ask for directions? Your lips look lonely. I am putting you on my to-do list. Oh, you like sleeping? Me too! Mind if I test the zipper?, 17. Smile if you want to have sex with me. Ive got something you can bounce on. Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit. I am like calcium bicarbonate. STDs are like Pokemon baby, gotta catch em all! Because I put the D in Raw. Can you put your hair into pigtails for me? Here are some funny, cringe-worthy and dirtiest pick-lines ever created. Can I measure your foot with my foot long retraceable stick!, 38. This website uses cookies to give you the best experience. Over a drink. Here they are, the ultimate list of Tinder pick up lines, that will get you ahead of the 90% of rejected men and help you actually get laid, instead of unmatched for the 10th time in one day! Because youre raisin my dick. 2. 1 Sleeping alone is a waste of my sexual talent. Sex is evil; Evil is sin; Sin is forgiven; so lets begin., 30. Use these Tinder pick up lines to get a response every time, without fail. Do you like warm weather? What, you dont like pizza?, 42. They are cheesy and funny, and maybe they might just work for you. 39. Hello girl, I am a bisexual. How would you like to be the next notch on my bed post? Can I run through your sprinkler?, 25. 16. Can you do telekinesis? You are either a sphere or a donut, decide!, 49. Hard to get off, but extremely satisfied once you do. Can you do telekinesis? Did you just come out of the oven? 60. Give me your name so I know what to scream tonight. It shows just how sillyyou are and is just about the cutest way to let someone know you're interested. You can use them at a bar, on a date, on Tinder, for your partner, or even at work. 37. 116. 156. 11. 1. You're so sweet you're going to put Hershey's out of business. 10. Do you wanna die happy?, 10. I bet youre like Calcium Bicarbonate if I get you wet, the reaction will be explosive!, 16. 161. Im just like a Rubiks cube. I bring pizza. I did it so that you can be with me. I can take my pants off in two seconds. 27. Whats your favorite move? My dicks been feeling a little dead lately. Lets go to the lab and see if we can start a fire in that bunsen., 14. "Smile, if you want to have sex with me." 4. 10. Are you a sprinkler? Are you a parking ticket? Come here or my dick will start CUMING for you!, 14. 103. "Hey I think it's time for a break, and baby, your hands look like they could use a stretch." 32. You may be out of range, yet I would love to show you my domain., 27. "Have we met before?" is Ed's favorite pick-up line, even though it has a very low success rate with the ladies. Would you like to stroke my pet? Wasnt I supposed to eat you somewhere?, 8. You go down on me, and Ill owe you one. Did you send the invitation to the party between your legs in the post or do you wanna give it to me in person? Here we have compiled some of the funniest Malaysian pickup lines and also the biggest fails. Her thoughts went from her stack of papers to her family. Ive got a mouthwash you can use any time of the day. Hey, do you have an inhaler? Is your name winter? Do you consider yourself a feminist? Screw me if Im wrong but havent we met before?, 42. I not good at algebra but you and I together make 69!! You look like youd be a good Quidditch player. Lets say we go to my place and I show you my dark side., 26. One of my friends told me girls hate oral, do you wanna help me prove him wrong? What do I have to do to be your booty call?, 11. Because you are fine. I'm craving something sweet. Wanna come back to my room and see my copy of Euclids Elements?, 58. You know sometimes you've to step up and improve how you approach someone. The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on the floor. Are you flappy bird? Im trying to build a fire between my legs and wouldnt mind using your wood., 44. Cause I wanna give you the 4th letter of the alphabet. 3. 2.7K Likes, 102 Comments. Head at my place, tail at yours. What time do you get off? If you dont want to go all the way, you can still partially derive me., 5. Would it be weird if I wanted to bang your brains out, or just that I didnt call you after?, 49. If you were Kim Jung Un youd have no problem making me stand to attention. Do you want to give me an Australian kiss? Are you a stack of dirty dishes? We both bring the cuddles. "They say that kissing is a language of . Do not try to convince him or her that you're smart. Could you give me directions to your apartment? I said: Do you want to taste my drink?, 29. I may not look like much, but Ive got it where it counts, kid., 29. Im here to rescue you. 6. A part of me is tense and I think youre perfect for easing it. You'll be surprised at how well it works. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. 184. cuz I feel a level-up., 49. 84. [shakes head in disgust] You're so pretty you actually made me forget my terrible pick-up line. blargman327 Report 45 points [Girl: What?] Me 'n' u. Squirtle isnt the ONLY one that can use water gun. Why/why not? Or is it just you? Apparently Captain Marvel says this. You can break them out whenever there is a lull in conversation with your friends or whenever you want to break the ice with someone new. Everybody wants unique Pick Up Lines. It involves bodily fluids. You must be chlorine cause you are polarizing my bond., 28. Because your pussys getting smashed tonight. Pick up lines to get any girl you want original sound - Marlon Patrick. 1. Because I need you to look at my pussy, 53. I believe youll find my Hardy-Littlewood quite maximal., 31. 146. Because I could compliment you all day!, 41. This also applies to pick up lines, each culture and language has their own including Filipino pick up lines. Would you like to help it rest? 2. 65. You remind me of a leaf blower. Cause I wanna give you kids. Enter your email and I'll send you some PROVEN techniques, tips and sneaky tricks that's helping "average" men get laid regularly. Damn! If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?, 48. Where are you going? Funny, Dirty Pick-Up Lines 1. 5. In my mind, were going to have sex anyway, so you might as well be in the room., 1. Because you've been running through my mind all day. Rumor has it you like bouncing. 106. Oftentimes, they're creepy to the point of deserving a slap. Are you a tortilla? 73. I can think of an activity for us to do that rhymes with muck. Youre just like a wine tasting. I know youre not holomorphic everywhere so why dont you let me find your singularities., 1. I might be a physics major, but Im no Bohr in bed., 11. 1) cuddles 2) a bedtime story 3) some dick, Did you grow up on a farm? So, wanna fuck?, 46. Call me leaves, because you should be blowing me. 3. Do you work at Subway? Girl are you an iceberg? Cause I saw you checking out my package., 3. Youre going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night. Do you mix concrete for a living? [Girl: Why?] [Girl: How?] Are you my new boss? 134. How long has it been since your last checkup? Lets play house you can be the door, so I can slam you all I want!, 39. 181. Do you wanna LICKILICKY my icky sticky?, 60. So, what are the chances of my balls slappin your ass tonight?, 7. "Hi, My Name Is [insert name]." I'd say this one is the number one pick-up line of all time. What is meant by that is the strength of the pick up line, and the reaction - or offence - it might . Want to come over to my place and watch porn on my 32" flat screen mirror? 18. Are you feeling a little down? Let me insert my plug into your socket and we can generate some electricity. I ought to complain to Spotify for you. You be the numerator, and I will be the denominator, so both of us can reduce to the simplest form., 2. You should sit on my face and wiggle your hips. He had a pot belly. And I have the underwear to match., 26. Hi, Im a burglar and Im going to smash your back door in. I hope you like dragons, because Ill be dragon my balls across your face tonight. Anyone with a good sense of humor will appreciate them. I dont have any muggle money, but I do have a sickle and two knuts., 5. I heard you are looking for a stud. Helps way more if you're attractive and/or have a great body (i.e. Whatll you say we make like Winnie-the-poo and I can get my nose stuck in your honey jar., 23. What, you dont like pizza?. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth? Have you ever slept with a [use the color of your hair]? Once you are done checking them, vote for the most hilarious pick-up lines and share this article with your friends! I know your crush is dead. 52. They would either laugh by the silliness of it, smile or think that you're cute for having the courage to break the ice in such manner. 98. You are one kinky lady ;). Let's be honest.You want to get laid right NOW. Want to spend the night inside my tauntaun? Scrambled, poached or fertilized?, 51. Theres more than one Whomping Willow at Hogwarts, you know., 4. Because I wanna taste you again and again without any sense of shame. Always consult your doctor/physician before you will try any remedy or cure for any condition you suffer from! Im the opposite of an Elf. Home. Direct gambits- involves honesty and getting straight to the point (e.g., "Although I'm usually shy, I'd like to know you.") Innocuous gambits- involves hiding one's true intentions (e.g., "what's your view of that band.") The study revealed that women prefer innocuous pick-up lines. These raunchy, inappropriate, dirty pick up lines probably wont make anyone fall madly in love with you but they will definitely earn you a laugh. My magical watch says youre not wearing any panties? Cause that ass is calling me!, 2. Are you a chocolate cake? What do you call Bob Marley, Ziggy Marley, Damian Marley and Ky-Mani Marley? Ill be Ken, and you can be the box I come in., 45. You strip, and Ill poke you., 48. 8. If we get to work now, we could have a fourth of July baby by next year. Miss, If youve lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?, 9. I want to wear you like a pair of sunglasses One leg over each ear. 173. I'm going to give you the satisfaction of turning me down. 26. Im jealous of your dress. 168. [Girl: What?] Hey, what's your name? Because youre gonna be on your knees tonight. I'm a medic, I know your body better than you do! These are 100% fail-proof.Note: Aggressive openers work on the girls who are ready to bang, which is about 20%. Okay not sure about the last one, though! If you do not allow these cookies and scripts, you will experience less targeted advertising. [Pull out your dong.] Wanna play kite? Youre like my pinky toe, Im gonna bang you on every piece of furniture in my home. My zipper. I wanna split them and eat all the good stuff in the middle. Below we have compiled all of the best pick up lines quoted Barney Stinson from the TV series. Im scared of getting pregnant, so do you want to go up to my room and help me test all my condoms? You remind me of my cousin. If I were a watermelon, would you spit or swallow my seeds? I just want to stick it in your wooper., 6. They say to spit, but I always prefer swallowing. "You Must Be Worried Now That Donald Trump is President Because He Would Deport You Back to Heaven." I must be dancing with the devil, because you're hot as hell. Im not an expert in hardware, but I know that youd be able to screw my nuts off., 27. Are you a pirate? Did you hear about the fat Marley kid? #1. Put the phone down dude and get out there! Living on that large farm in the southern . I wanna floss with your pubic hair., 29. Lets play carpenter. Want to ride my broomstick?, 2. Want to come back to my place and do the Box-Cox transformation?, 53. That's it. Because I want to flip you over and eat you out!, 26. Would you like to try an Australian kiss? Ive been banned from playing Tapped Out. If you do not allow these cookies or scripts it is possible that embedded video will not function as expected. They say it's the happiest place on earth,. 130. You must be a conjugate prior, cause that posterior is tractible!, 51. I could really see myself periodically doing you on a table., 23. Dont stick out your tongue unless you intend to use it., 32. I hear youve been a bad boy. They made a new color lightsaber called flesh wanna see?, 24. Wanna go back to my place and save me? Oh, youre on your period? 114. "I can do this all day.". Corny, sweet, and funny all in one. [Girl: Why?] ], 17. Are you the lottery lady on TV? Is it hot in here? 8. Dont worry, you can pay in kind. It can hard to find fitting pick-up lines that you can use to grab a boy's or girl's interest in you. If I dont come in 30 minutes, the next one is free., 16. As the title says. It is the farmers who are hard-working people on this planet, caring for all of Us day and night. "I promise I won't need any rain checks on any dances.". Are you from Japan because Id like to get in japanties., 13. 158. Ive got some oral skills I can teach. The Trojans loved Helen so much they jumped into a horse; I love you so much I wanna jump into a Trojan., 30. Can you help? Saying smooth pick-up lines that hit just the right spot can be a herculean task, it has to be smooth, cheesy, and most importantly not creepy. I have 4% battery remaining. Why dont we head to my bedroom, peel back my Star Wars sheets, and discover what a true Jedi can do with his light-saber?, 16. 147. 81. to get a response every time, without fail. Want to learn to speak troll? Itll make it easier for me to ride you. 62. It would look great on my nightstand., 17. We should do the world a favor and go out on a date." u . Do you, by any chance, have any Italian in you? I dont have a Ferrari. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth?, 40. Your face says innocent but that body is telling me something completely different. Are you a supermarket sample? I'll put a tear drop in the ocean. The familiar buildings started to pop up in the distance. Lets play Barbie. Because of you, I laugh a little harder, cry a little less, and smile a lot more. Baby were asymptotic you get on top of me, and in the limit, we become one., 59. In concise terms, a pick-up line is a humorous conversation opener to grab a person's attention and engage them in a conversation for romantic purposes. When it gets hard, just Fuck it., 14. Ive recently qualified as a gynecologist and Id like to offer you my pro-boner services. Dirty Pick Up Lines That Will Make You Cringe! By Jamie Ballard Updated: Jan 26, 2023. J'ai pas l'habitude d'aborder des inconnus mais ton sourire m'a invit venir te parler. 127. 144. What is a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine? Because you have my privates standing at attention. Oddly, this line seems to work best if you're both pilots. Excuse me, but does my tongue taste funny to you? How To Break Up With Someone Toxic/Narcissistic Safely And Never LookBack, Signs You Lack Self-Love (And How To DevelopIt), The Best Relationship Advice No One Ever ToldYou, 5 Mindset Shifts To Stop RelationshipAnxiety, 6 Things To Stop Doing If You Want To FindLove. Baby, Im like a firefighter, I find em hot and leave em wet!, 43. Take that for what you will. 2020 Improb | All Rights Reserved | An Elite Cafe Media Publisher. I may not be a windshield repairman, but I can still fill your crack in. Youve been a very bad boy. Lets play strip poker. Whats the entry fee for your grand leg opening event? Rosanna looked over the wide fields and farm yards. If you see something you feel was created by you or someone you know. 5. 87. Because you can jack it when we get back to my place., 41. 164. Does this mean we are dating now or? 99. Are you cold? Because you're too hot. I couldve called heaven and asked for an angel, but I was hoping youre a slut instead!, 41. Wanna help me out?, 18. But it can be difficult to muster the courage to walk over to the girl you like, let alone try and figure out how to talk to girls. 5. !, 29. Are you ready to talk? Some men go around telling women they have an eight-inch penis, but Id never shortchange myself like that. "'Where are you from?' 'Uhhh. There are ten-thousand neurons in the end of my member and I want you to get every one of them firing. 169. Is it getting hot in here? Funny & Hilarious (But Still Dirty) Pick Up Lines Choose One From Examples Below 1. Wanna know what theyre saying? And then when you do make your way over, you can't figure out what to say. Save a broom; ride a Quidditch player., 14. Because I'm going to scream when I'm in you. 64. You look so good, I wanna kiss your lips and move up to your bellybutton. The following Cute Pick-Up Lines have been . Did you get those pants at 50% off? I heard Meowths not the only mischievious pussy in town., 55. Just to be clear, were both heading for the same bed tonight, right? See more ideas about pick up lines, pick up lines cheesy, pick up lines funny. 'Cause you've got FINE written all over you. Because you've got "fine" written all over you. Want to take part in my exchange program? Dont believe me? Have you heard about the latest nuclear dramas? Ill treat you like my homework: Slam you on the table and do you all night long!, 4. 2. Im just happy to see you., 30. Hi, Im wasted but this condom in my pocket doesnt have to be. Would you like to try an Australian kiss? Don't worry, I will NEVER spam you. I want to fuck you so bad, but I know that I cant., 21. If Im a pain in your ass We can just add more lubricant. That dress looks great on you as a matter of fact, so would I. Baby if you let your acid react with my base, you can count on getting 100 MOLES of my water and salt., 5. There are 7.8 billion smiles on earth, and I'm still waiting for yours. Do you want to have good sex? If you do not allow these cookies and scripts, we will not know when you have visited our site. Im not too good at algebra, but doesnt U+I = 69?, 26. Can I park my car in your garage? If you're hitting on a woman, you can't say anything about her wood she doesn't have one. Because youve got some big, round, beautiful melons. 45. Its a good thing that Im a pokemon trainer and can handle your Jigglypuffs!, 42. 149. You lose now take off your clothes., 18. Id like to use your thighs as earmuffs. "I'm not drunk, I'm intoxicated by you." I dont want to have sex without mutual consent; oh and by the way, you have my consent., 19. Youre like Pringles; once I pop you, I cant stop you., 6. Id love to explore the box your virginity came in. 68. Oh, youre a bird watcher. My dicks been feeling a little dead lately. My place Eight oclock Bring a friend., 13. You can be the door then I can slam you all I want. Let me put my lightsaber in your wookie., 20. The "Formula" That's Getting Average Men Laid (5 Nights Per Week). If you prefer to be a little funny and entertaining, you can try these sexy pick up lines for guys and girls.
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